YOU WERE WARNED.
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officially 2009.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
3:45 PM
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE :)
its officially 2009. not a good start to it though. i dont know how long it'll take to feel okay again..but i'm trying. but, again, it doesnt seem to be working. every little bad thing just keeps piling up on me. i had hoped i could just forget about my past and start from a new beginning. looks like im not so lucky.
wow. i thought today was going to be easy. smooth. and YOU JUST HAVE TO RUIN IT AGAIN. you know, out of everything you've ever done to me, i think this is the worst. no, actually, YOU ARE THE WORST THING IN MY LIFE. you've lied to me, ruined my life, and just about taken away every happy thought, every belief i ever had. AND YOU SAID YOU CARED. surprise huh. i dont think you even care. at least, you care about HER much more than us. wtf? you dont even know me. you dont know us. you never did. and dont expect us to tell you everything. you gotta find out for yourself. if you bother. you cant buy love. or acceptance. and especially mine. you know, i thought things might be better. but after what i just found out, after every one of my suspicions were confirmed, i really just want you to stay outta my life.
awkward much? why can i not get along, but she can? its not that i dont want to get along. im just not used to the idea yet. and its probably gonna take a very long time till i am. you seem like a nice person, really. but you just dont fit in my world yet. unless your able to prove that your worthy of my love, i dont give a damn about you. and i can be very very stubborn when i want to, just like my sister. for now, you have ruined my life too. all of this, is for her. so you might be wondering why i should care so much. after all, kids shouldnt worry about what happened with their parents right? yea. thats what i thought too. yet you still drag me into your world. you dont even belong. you never did. YOU NEVER TRIED. the main reason for all this, is simply because SHES THE ONE WHO CARED ALL THESE YEARS. and you? NOTHING. you don't know anything about my life. AT ALL. you don't even BOTHER.
you hurt her. you hurt me. you said you "like" me. sure. sure. i totally believe that. you "like" me, but you "love" her. WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN. i want you to be happy, but this isnt working out. you lied to me. you've made me cry, you've ruined my life. and im never going to forgive you for that. ever. and here i was, thinking you were better than that. so i was wrong. AGAIN.
signed, yours truly♥
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Angie here. I have a much much longer name but I'll leave it as it is for the sake of internet safety precautions.
:) 5 things you should know about me: